A writing to B (II)
I was desperate all day after talking to you on the phone. I wanted to know God like you now know Him. I avoided the issue all day until I finally faced up to it. I started asking Him, "Do you really love me?" And in return He asked me a question loud as thunder, "Would you willingly stop fighting for [C] even if I won't let you?"
It was a ridiculous question. Totally unfair. I refused to answer Him but He knew what was coming next. He broke me again. He continued, "If you, being you, would stop at nothing to win a girl's heart - a girl you can't even say in all honesty that you have it in you to love, do you think I would stop loving you even if I try?"
How amazing! And you're right, nothing I do or fail to do will ever stop Him from loving me and wanting to give me His best. At least I know that's what I'm prepared to do for C (whether or not I'll have the opportunity to do it is beside the point). But God's love for me is far stronger than mine for C. And I thought mine was strong enough.
I can't say I get it now. I have yet to glorify Him for His love for me and His readiness to give me His best as soon as I let Him. Please pray for me and wait for my next mail, I'll soon be able to tell.