Girls don't just know what they want, you believe it now. They know it better than guys... and much earlier... and with much more conviction than we'll ever match.
Met a girl today who even before she had any boyfriend, had decided that she'd fall in love instead of going out on dates. She was only 17 then.
You only made that decision after so many trials. Even then you were kind of pussyfooting. You've been warned many times against girls like that by the collective male wisdom passed down from as way back as genesis; what they'd expect from you... how they'd manipulate you to get what they want... what you must do to hold your ground...
The truth is, that's how we guys would love to commit ourselves but never could. It's such an easy pass to say that guys would not commit themselves. We would if we can help it--in front of women more real than us we just can't. No wonder your kind has always been intimidated by such a display of will by the opposite sex, and for once you feel like betraying your kind. The only problem is there aren't enough girls like that these days. Girls who really know what they want and won't compromise their values even when everyone else is living differently.
Oy! There are much fewer guys like that.
3 comments:
i read 2 articles sort of back to back on a female magazine the other day. i think i blogged this topic.. one article says.. hey.. i think i told you about this in the car during ur last visit.. "if you know that's the one person for the rest of your life, you would want forever to start right now" or sumthing like that... the "romantic-nise" version of love.. that whn that one special being appears in ur life.. u know..
it talks about ppl who dated for ages to break up meet a new person and ywam bam, thank you ma'm get married.. because its *love* this time..
so the article advise ppl of finding out what u really want and don't just settle etc etc.. review ur own relationship now.. is it based on love and comfort.. is this what u want etc etc....
and with equally contradicting advice i feel is the next article on people who rush into marriage and are married 2-3 time before they hit middle age.. or are in a whirlwind relationship, get married and PAP divorced..
so here they advise you that the firework might end and u end up with just the "real" person without the halo effect and u gotta deal with that etc etc...
i found both article deeply distrubing.. it is so contradicting to start but it also shows that these so call female magazine promotes really low self esteem among women.. if u are in a comfortable relationship with a guy u like, enjoy and can life with.. that's NOT enough unless u have *fireworks*. If you're celebrating forth of july everyday, bewarn.. it will end soon and you'll have to deal with real issue.. do you also connect on that level...?
MY GODDDD.. when is it enough..??
do you know what all this does to women or impressionable young girls? they look for the perfect life... you are smart, stylish, have flawless skin, wear cloths and make up than conceals your misgiving.. have a understanding new age bf/husband/partner that you have and make fireworks with and you are recognised and promoted in your work place and makes tons of money at the same time have satusfaction in the job you do...
tell me.. how many people have that??? and can achive that? it'll be at the peak of Maslow's hierachy of needs lah...
what is sad.. single females- late 30s, early 30s... smart, successful, attractive... seeking single guy, genearlly good looking, successful, worldly, smart, respect women, looking for a long term relationship, preferably do not smoke or drink too much etc etc...
who many are there left..? but no... no.. don't settle until u find Mr. RIght... "i rather not marry then to be badly married off"
okies, good point.. but are u setting the bar for being well married off?
fast forward to 10 years later.. still single, and bitter but no no.. it is for the better she says...
aiyoyo....
Hey Tin, nice blog. Loved the Imprudent Knight
Oh, and btw, knowing what you want is not a gender issue. It is more of a personality issue.
Having said that, it is also true that, in general, girls mature faster than guys: physically as well as mentally/emotionally. So out of two people of the same age, the girl is definitely more sure of what she wants.
Adelaine, it is never enough, if relationships are evaluated continually on all parameters. I think the best we can do is see what's more important to us and evaluate relationships on those parameters, and be willing to compromise on the rest.
If we stop searching for Mr./Ms. "Right" and start looking for Mr./Ms. "Good Enough", we'll be all right :) 'cause no one's perfect.
Adelaine, our fates are forever intertwined through our blogs - hahaha! My comments on all the above found in http://adelaine.blogspot.com/2004/12/know-what-you-want.html#110388428096876984
Ani, thanks!! Glad you like the blog and what you find in here.
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